Why am I here?

Ah, one of life’s great imponderable questions. Is it to learn? To procreate? To have a damn fine time?

I cannot answer that question. But I can tell you the reason I created Nonsense on the Menu and why I think your visit is worthwhile.

(Oh, that’s what you were asking in the first place, you say? Jolly good, then.)

Since 2000, I have lived in the mighty Tulse Hill, South London. Like much of the Southern part of our capital, this corner of the city is blessed with numerous takeaway food outlets. From fried chicken to Indian to, er, fried chicken, quick and occasionally tasty food is never far away.

Frankly the market is flooded. What that means is that us South Londoners are bombarded with takeaway menus on a more or less daily basis. Once – not so very long ago – I regarded these pieces of paper as nothing more than an environmentally wasteful annoyance. But then I started reading them. And I realised that these menus are so much more than a guide to the food offered at your local takeaway. Sometimes, if you’re very lucky, they are works of comedic genius.

I started collecting particularly wonderful examples of South London menu comedy and sharing them with my brother. But it quickly became clear that these works deserved wider attention. And so “Nonsense on the Menu” was born.

Enjoy.