Classic

If you're in a pizza restaurant with me, there is no need to ask me what I am going to order. 99 times out of 100 the answer is going to be the same: Margherita. Some mock this choice, suggesting that it is unadventurous in the extreme. I have always confidentally countered with the argument that I am ordering a classic pizza. Mozzarella, tomato and basil: how can you go wrong? I tell people I favour the original and best (and, yes, I am also a big Kellogg's fan).

I am sad to report that it now seems my confident pronouncements have been highly misguided. I, it seems, have no idea quite what is meant by a classic pizza:

A pizza ain't a pizza without a meat that most people only eat once a year!

 To borrow from the mighty David Letterman: boy is my face red.